Ducking, avoiding, and ignoring

Things in life come up that you really ought to deal with right away. These are things that shouldn't be a big deal, and shouldn't take that long to deal with. These are also the same things that I will procrastinate until the end of time. For me, these are things like: my taxes, my expense claims, writing requirements specifications, and blogging about some of the things we are working through with Doug.

I know that I should just do it - let my thoughts flow - and then read the outcome. There will probably be some understanding there that will make the chaos in my mind subside. So let the blogging (or flogging?) begin.

Doug will, at some point in his life, need a power wheelchair for all of his mobility needs. My head knows this, but every time I think about it there's a little dagger in my heart that twists just a little bit. I also know that much before this time, he will need a "regular" wheelchair for occasional use and long distances. Taking this to it's logical conclusion, this implies that at some point in his life, he will be getting his "first" wheelchair.

I think you can see where this is going.

We've got an appointment to fit Doug for his first wheelchair in a couple of weeks. He won't need it then any more than he needs it right now, but it takes kids a while to get used to things too. He still needs help with travelling for longer periods of time, and longer distances. We currently use a stroller for that, but a stroller isn't really suitable for a boy who is now closer to 5 then 4. So, we are going out wheelchair shopping.

For those of you who share the same heart-dagger I do, shed not too many tears. Look at this from the eyes of a boy whose muscles are weak. A wheelchair is a way to continue moving when the alternative is to wait in the car. We are not "putting him into a wheelchair". We are replacing his stroller with a wheelchair, and continuing to encourage him to walk and run whenever possible.

And from the eyes of his peers? From kids in wheelchairs we’ve talked to, it has been important to them that the wheelchair is seen by their peers as simply a part of their life. And kids accept that far more easily than grownups do. For kids, the wheelchair often helps explain why “Johnny” can’t do the same things as well as they can. Once they have an explanation, they continue on being kids. They don’t have the same mental roadblocks we do. Studies have shown that kids simply view the “technical aides” as an “extension” of the person.

All this is well and good to explain in a blog. But how do you explain it to a Doug and Samantha? I'm not as convinced that I'll be able to explain it well. Doug already has an inkling, and the memory of it breaks my little heart. We were on the phone a fair amount figuring out where and how and when to do this. Doug overhead part of a conversation. His response was "A wheelchair for Doug?" followed a few moments later by "I don't need a wheelchair" - delivered in the cutest pensive voice you ever heard.

Pray for wisdom in approaching this subject.
(I'll post again when we have so you'll know when we've told the kids)